The Empty House Studio
9 years ago
A rock. Me. A hard place.
Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulner- able. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life.... You give them a piece of you... your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so a simple phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love. -- Neil Gaiman
To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket - safe, dark, motionless, airless - it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. The alternative to tragedy, or at least to the risk of tragedy, is damnation. The only place outside Heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers and perturbations of love is Hell. -- C.S. Lewis
If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you
But make allowance for their doubting too,
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:
If you can dream--and not make dreams your master,
If you can think--and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:
If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it all on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!"
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings--nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much,
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And--which is more--you'll be a Man, my son!
If by Rudyard Kipling
Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD. - Ps. 27:14
I saw moreover in my dream, that the Interpreter took him by the hand, and had him into a little room, where sat two little children, each one in his chair: the name of the eldest was Passion, and of the other, Patience; Passion seemed to be much discontent, but Patience was very quiet. Then Christian asked, 'What is the reason of the discontent of Passion?' The Interpreter answered, 'The Governor of them would have him stay for his best things till the beginning of the next year, but he will have all now: but Patience is willing to wait.' -- Pilgrim's Progress
Blessed are all who wait for him! -- Isaiah 30:18
- more articles submitted to RelevantMag, and other online rags.
- Dave finds himself back on the market again after 5 years off, is not pleased with his initial findings (read: this is not Dave saying he is dating. Dave hates dating)
- favorite places in NYC (just in time for autumn explorations)
- on Instant Messaging and the totally non-committal youth culture (although I think I wrote on this before, somewhere...)
- a techy piece on how I have my computers set up and what I want to do next, by the nerd in me
- lots more comment posts (perhaps a return to regular weekend posts, with these), as I'll be updating my "Reflections in a Diamond Eye" file - more on that later
But when they said, "Give us a king to lead us," this displeased Samuel; so he prayed to the LORD. And the LORD told him: "Listen to all that the people are saying to you; it is not you they have rejected, but they have rejected me as their king. As they have done from the day I brought them up out of Egypt until this day, forsaking me and serving other gods, so they are doing to you. Now listen to them; but warn them solemnly and let them know what the king who will reign over them will do."
Samuel told all the words of the LORD to the people who were asking him for a king. He said, "This is what the king who will reign over you will do: He will take your sons and make them serve with his chariots and horses, and they will run in front of his chariots. Some he will assign to be commanders of thousands and commanders of fifties, and others to plow his ground and reap his harvest, and still others to make weapons of war and equipment for his chariots. He will take your daughters to be perfumers and cooks and bakers. He will take the best of your fields and vineyards and olive groves and give them to his attendants. He will take a tenth of your grain and of your vintage and give it to his officials and attendants. Your menservants and maidservants and the best of your cattle and donkeys he will take for his own use. He will take a tenth of your flocks, and you yourselves will become his slaves. When that day comes, you will cry out for relief from the king you have chosen, and the LORD will not answer you in that day."
But the people refused to listen to Samuel. "No!" they said. "We want a king over us. Then we will be like all the other nations, with a king to lead us and to go out before us and fight our battles."
When Samuel heard all that the people said, he repeated it before the LORD. The LORD answered, "Listen to them and give them a king." -- 1 Sam 8:6-22a
Acknowledging the huge death rate [in the plagues in the cities of the ancient Roman empire], Dionysius noted that though this terrified the pagans, Christians greeted the epidemic as merely "schooling and testing." Thus, at a time when all other faiths were called to question, Christianity offered explanation and comfort. Even more important, Christian doctrine provided a prescription for action. That is, the Christian way appeared to work...
At the height of the second great epidemic, around 26, in the Easter letter...Dionysius wrote a lengthy tribute to the heroic nursing efforts of local Christians, many of whom lost their lives while caring for others.
Most of our brother Christians showed unbounded love and loyalty, never sparing themselves and thinking only of one another. Heedless of danger, they took charge of the sick. Attending to their every need and ministering to them in Christ, and with them departed this life serenely happy; for they were infected by others with the disease, drawing on themselves  the sickness of their neighbors and cheerfully accepting their pains. Many, in nursing and curing others transferred their death to themselves, and died in their stead...
-- Rodney Stark, The Rise of Christianity
Bono: Yes, I think that's normal. It's a mind-blowing concept that the God who created the Universe might be looking for company, a real relationship with people, but the thing that keeps me on my knees is the difference between Grace and Karma.
Assayas: I haven't heard you talk about that...
Bono: At the center of all religions is the idea of Karma. You know, what you put out comes back to you: an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, or in physics--in physical laws--every action is met by an equal or an opposite one. It's clear to me that Karma is at the very heart of the Universe. I'm absolutely sure of it. And yet, along comes this idea called Grace to upend all that "as you reap, so will you sow" stuff. Grace defies reason and logic. Love interrupts, if you like, the consequences of your actions, which in my case is very good news indeed, because I've done a lot of stupid stuff.
Assayas: I'd be interested to hear that.
Bono: That's between me and God. But I'd be in big trouble if Karma was going to finally be my judge. It doesn't excuse my mistakes, but I'm holding out for Grace. I'm holding out that Jesus took my sins onto the Cross, because I know who I am, and I hope I don't have to depend on my own religiosity. -- from Bono in Conversation with Michka Assayas
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate, our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. Your playing small does not serve the world, there is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We were all meant to shine as children do. Its not just in some of us, its in everyone. And as we all let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same, as we are liberated from our own fear - our presence automatically liberates others. Sir, I just want to say 'thank you,' you saved my life. -- Timo Cruise (Rick Gonzales), Coach Carter
Guess what? That's right. I hate work. I don't hate my job; I just hate work in general. I know this to be true because I hate work at home (i.e. laundry, dishes, etc.) just as much as I hate it here at my job (heretofore undistinguished from "work" - it should be noted that an underlying presupposition to this litany is that work and job are two entirely different entities).
It all goes back to that stupid Adam guy. Boy, did we humans ever had it made, running around butt naked, eating anything we wanted except fruit from one stinking tree in a whole huge garden (how hard was this concept, really?), no hurt, no pain, life was great, you never got sick or died or anything. Then it all went to heck in a hand-basket.
This whole "sweat of your brow" thing - suitable punishment for man's sin, I grant God that (although it is still under debate as to whether it was actually "man's" sin - yet regardless of who's sin it was, Adam did, however, set the perfect initial example of what has become known as "blame" when he said "the woman You gave me..." - notice he blames both the woman and God for giving him the woman. Classic.). Nevertheless, it never said anywhere that we were explicitly required to love work. So I propose that whoever first came up with the insane idea that work was something you should love, was, in fact, an absolute moron.
Now, since we postulate that most people (present company excluded, naturally) are generally stupid, we can assume that most people are of the mind (or lack thereof) that you can, ideally, find work that you actually love. These people are stupid because they believe this, and they believe this because they are stupid. It is a vicious cycle.
Side note: some say you should fear stupid people in large numbers, I say fear large numbers of people. Chances are there are more stupid people than not in any given large group. Most smart people are too cautious to gather too often with any group of people for fear of too much association with stupid people, as stupidity has, in rare instances, been known to be contagious.
To my point, I don't believe there is such a thing as work that can be loved. Labor of love is an oxy moron, when in situations where the labor is the focus (i.e. the apostle who coined the phrase meant labor of LOVE, not LABOR of love). Perhaps it may be said that there are jobs that you can love, but are these really work? No. They are a form of something, anything else (relaxing, playing, thinking, what have you...) that you happen to get paid for. This is what I want. That I could love.
Please contact me if you know where I can find this. Of course, if you did know where I could find this, you would keep it to yourself, if you were smart. And since I have formerly excluded present company from the category of idiocy, my request is rendered moot.
I rephrase - please forward this to stupid people you may be pained to know who do have jobs that they love (and likely, therefore, think they love their work). Ask them to get back to me with info.
Thanks,
---David---